A Blogger’s Haiku
Shiny new design
Make me more frequent blogger?
Who am I kidding.
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News
Um, yeah, so… this is new
I decided, being a web designer and all, that having a hosted blog over on wordpress.com was really not the best showcase of my abilities. (What’s that saying? The shoemaker’s kids go barefoot, and the web designers have boring pre-fabbed blogs that aren’t even on their own domain?) And, while I love being known as grammar geek, there’s more to me than just grammar.
So, welcome to The Rauch Motel.
The name started as a joke… I used to answer the phone with it when I lived with the parents. Most family members got a kick out of it (yes, you pronounce the name kinda like the bug… yes, I’m just that lame. 
), ’til my grandmother made reservations for herself and her bird, Joey. Two days later, she fell at work, dislocated her shoulder, and came to stay with us for a few months while she got better. My mom forbade me from answering the phone like that ever again. But she never said anything about blogs…
I’m not completely sure about the decor around here… it’s a free template that I tweaked a bit, but eventually I’ll have something new and all me. But it’ll do for now. And, I’ve pulled all of the posts and comments from my old blog and another blog I started and pooped out on, so that’s how you may have managed to comment on a blog you’ve never been to before.
But, here we are… there will be posts about our mini dashchund Oscar, who oddly enough is the biggest search term that brings visitors here, about the fixing up T and I are doing in our new move in ready house (the one with no electricity in the top-half of the house, and the kitchen cupboards still in boxes in the dining room), about all things web design, and some grammar/editing posts.
Reservations not required…
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Stuff
A funny…
Granted, I’m feeling more than a little old after celebrating a birthday this past weekend, but I did get a kick out of this ad:
Web Designer Depot is doing a whole post on funny ads, but this one was my favourite. Hey, if I have to get older, I might as well embrace it…
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Stuff
Why I think Kanye’s a brilliant marketer
Don’t get me wrong… what he did to Taylor Swift at the VMAs? Totally bad form. You just don’t do that to anyone, let alone a teenager who’s accepting her first award and is probably scared shitless to be there.
But here’s the thing… Kanye probably didn’t have a hope in hell of winning any of the awards he was up for… and it was for video, not even for the music, and his competition was pretty big. But at the end of the awards, who’s the one person everyone was talking about? Kanye.
And in six months, when people think back to the VMAs, they’re gonna be like… who was it Kanye interrupted while giving her speech? Oh, I don’t remember. But damn, Kanye’s a douche.
And, really, that’s probably his biggest goal from standing up there and crapping on that poor little girl. He wants people talking about him. And looking at blogs, twitter and forums after the fact? Kanye is the number one topic of conversation… even though he didn’t win anything. Even though there were much bigger stars and much bigger awards coming out of the event.
Because, honestly? Beyonce’s video was the best video ever? Really? I mean, I’ve never watched the whole video, I’ve actually never been a big fan of watching music videos – I’ve never even seen the one I’m in, for Pete’s sake – but from what I’ve seen, all she does is dance around in a little leotard, right? How is that the best video ever?
But what he was talking about? Not the point… Beyonce was just an easy excuse. The whole point? Look at Kanye.
So, douche move? Totally. Brilliant marketing move? Oh, hell yeah.
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Peanut, Peanut Butter… Jelly.
I have had this song in my head for over a week and it’s driving me crazy. So now you get to have it in your head:
My senior kindergarten teacher was Bram’s sister in law, so I remember he came to our class to sing with us a bunch of times. Though, it’s kinda scary how I still remember not only the lyrics but the hand gestures too.
I guess it could be worse… I could have made you listen to skinamarink…
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Decorating
The big bargoons
So, with the big move starting on Tuesday (we take possession on Tuesday, but don’t actually leave my house ’til the 15th…), T and I have been out and about trying to find furniture that’s brand new to us (as in, not hand me down from the parents), looks good and isn’t completely out of our budget.
This morning, while procrastinating the whole packing thing by surfing design blogs, looking for inspiration, I came across this announcement. I’ve done the warehouse sale thing before, and I know these things get really busy really quickly, so I literally ran upstairs, jumped on T’s head ’til he woke up and dragged him outta the house.
We made excellent time across the city, and managed to score this totally gorgeous sectional for the new family room:
It was one of the last few items they had that wasn’t sold out, and we paid only 30% of the original price.
Even better, it’s big and comfy for lounging around on to watch TV (the big screen is our next big purchase), and could double as a guest bed in a pinch.
I’m seeing it against chocolate brown walls, with cream trim, and pops of blue and green…
Now, on to the kitchen. 
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Decorating
And… it's official
My house has sold. PHEW. Thank goodness. I was really worried my house would linger on the market long after we took possession of the new house.
But as of the beginning of April we’ll be moving from here:
to here:
Now someone else gets to live here, mischievous ghost and all.
But it’s a little weird. I bought this house right after I started working. It was my first place, other than residence at school, that I lived in other than my parents’ house. And the idea that someone else is going to be living here, calling this place that has been my sanctuary for over nine years home, is a little freaky.
While there’s a few bad memories, and I sure as heck am not gonna miss the floor-to-ceiling, wall-to-wall mirrors in my living/dining room, I met T when I lived here. We brought Oscar home here. Wow. it’s gonna be odd.
I’m excited, though, for the new house. It’s a fair bit bigger, which gives us a bit more room to spread out in. I’m looking forward to being able to lie all over the couch while I work without having to listen to sports or narrative history shows. And T’s pretty darn excited about the video game room (or, er, basement. lol). And Oscar’s so gonna love the giant backyard to play around in.
But it’s still gonna be weird.
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Decorating
Making a little white box
When I moved into my little house, my decorating style was a little…. well, it was weird. I could blame the woman I bought the house from, with her leopard-print toilet seat (which, she actually made part of our sales contract that she got to take with her. lol.), and animals sponge-painted into the downstairs bathroom, but really, I just liked bright colours and slightly odd designs. (Which, considering I’m slightly odd, kinda fits. )
So, I painted Cinderalla’s castle on the walls of my spare room, my upstairs bathroom is an aquarium, and every room is a different colour – from my green and silver kitchen, to my red, black and white living/dining room, to my bright pink office and my dark purple bedroom.
The thing is, I’m trying to sell this house. And the slightly odd colours that made me happy 8 or 9 years ago don’t really appeal to the average home buyer. But, with all of my design ideas (not to mention my budget) saved for the new house, I really don’t have the inclination to repaint this house.
But that’s the thing. When I bought the new house, we didn’t look at the colours. In fact, I think I’d have a hard time telling you what colours they used in that house. Because once I knew it was going to be mine, all I can think of is the new colours I’m going to put in there (even if they will be slightly less in your face as my current house, tho not less odd. 
). So, why is it that people come into my house and are scared of some paint? The house is clean, there’s no real “we have to fix that” ares, so there isn’t a lot of work that they’d need to do, except slap a few coats of paint up in a couple of rooms.
My realtor doesn’t think I should go out of my way to repaint, but I’m worried. I love the “sell your house” shows on TV and they *always* repaint in these blah neutral colours.
What do you think? If the house was perfect in every way, except for bright colours on the wall, would you still buy it? Or would you be scared off by pink, purple and red?
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Oh, the embarrassment
So, I have this friend who I’ve known since Junior Kindergarten (and, considering the traumatic birthday I celebrated last week, it scares me how long ago that was…). We kept in touch all through school, even though she moved away sometime during grade 1. She even used to make up Nancy-Drew-type mysteries and plant clues all over her neighbourhood to give us something to do when I’d come visit. (Which, my 13-year-old self who just wanted to talk about boys didn’t really appreciate, but my much older self now thinks was a pretty darn cool thing to do).
The thing is… after we left school and went out into the world, our paths diverged completely. To the point that we completely lost touch of what was going on in each other’s lives. I saw her a few years ago, and she’d had four daughters, two of whom, I didn’t even know existed. And even though we had a great catch up time all those years ago, and even though I think about her every once in a while, the thought of picking up the phone and calling her kinda scares me, because it’s been soooo long. And I *should* call, because again, soooo long. And yet I don’t. Because I’m embarrassed at how long it’s been.
Well… I’m beginning to feel that way about my blog. At first, I was just so overwhelmed, I didn’t have time to write a blog post. (Well, that’s not entirely true, I have about 20 half-written posts that I never got around to finishing). Then, a few weeks had passed, then a few months, and my blog posts have pretty much dwindled down to just blogging my new releases. And I feel bad that I’ve been neglecting my poor little blog, and you my blog readers who come here looking for some kind of grammatical blogging and not just months of silence. And, yes, a lot embarrassed.
So, I’m sucking it up and facing the music… and making an effort to start blogging again.
Hi. I’m Laurie. It’s been a while. How’ve you been? What’s new and exciting in your lives?
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I really should go make a phone call…
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Editing Writing
GMC, not just a car company
Over the past few weeks I’ve read a lot of manuscripts, between being a judge for my local RWA chapter contest, and trying to make a big old dent in my submissions folder (uh, let’s just say my plan to have it empty by the end of the month may have been a little ambitious… *sigh*). And it seems just about every single thing I read, I found myself making the exact same comment…
Where’s the GMC?
For those of you who aren’t up on the acronyms, GMC stands for Goal, Motivation, Conflict (See the totally kick-assingly awesome Goal, Motivation & Conflict, The Building Blocks of Good Fiction by Debra Dixon). Your main characters (in a romance, that’s both the hero and the heroine, or both heroes, depending on whether it’s an M/F or M/M) need to have a GMC. Essentially, your story comes from what each character wants, why he/she wants it and what’s keeping him/her from getting it (and it’s even better if the other character’s goal and motivation is a factor in what’s keeping him/her from getting it).
If the characters are just hanging out letting stuff happen to them/around them, you’re missing a driving force in moving your story forward, and basically keeping your reader interested with what’s going on.
Now, one thing I have to stress, bickering? Not conflict. And I keep seeing this over and over again and the only thing it’s doing is making me dislike the characters. If the heroine is a bitch to the hero simply because you’re trying to prolong the will they/won’t they-ness of your story? You’re missing conflict. If the heroine is a bitch to the hero because he owns a giant book store conglomerate and he’s trying to put her little bookshop around the corner out of business, even though it’s been in her family for eight generations? Ahhh, now we have conflict.
T and I watched The Bourne Ultimatum a few nights ago and while I was watching, I realized that the Bourne movies are a perfect example of a good GMC – Jason wants to find out who he is and how he became a mercenary killer (goal), because he has no memory of his past (motivation), but the CIA/FBI/pickyouralphabethere don’t want him to, because he’ll find out deep dark secrets that could get some very powerful people in serious trouble (conflict).
So, what is it that makes me fall asleep smack in the middle of every single one of these movies? Because no matter what I’m doing, or where we are *cough* the drive in *cough*, I have yet to watch a Bourne movie all the way through. I mean, it has the GMC I crave, so what’s up?
Well, while the trilogy has this great GMC keeping things going, for me, I also needed character development. Sure, Jason found out the big secret at the end of the three movies, woohoo, but basically, the movies are two hours of people chasing Jason, Jason chasing people, and lots of shooting. Did we find out why Jason made the choice he made that ended up with him being involved in the secret? No. Do we understand what happened in his past that led him to make that decision? No. Do we even find out how he feels about his part in this secret? Nope, not that either. And that motivation and insight into his character is what would have made the movies interesting enough to keep me awake.
And without these two elements, your story becomes less a story and more a vignette of two people’s lives. And with a vignette, your story just sorta plods along all happy and stuff until it ends. Big deal. Think about this, if Glinda had told Dorothy how to get home to Kansas before she started on the Yellow Brick Road, would we have followed her down it? Met the Scarecrow? The Tin Man? The Lion? Elpheba? Nope. And we woulda missed out on a lotta good stuff.
So don’t make us miss out on the good stuff. Kick your characters. And just when they think they’ve gotten back up? Kick em again. And again. And again. Until they’ve overcome every single obstacle you’ve thrown in their way and grown as a person in the process.
Then, and only then, will you have a great story.
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